Illusion of Balance

I was reading out of my daily meditation book, when I came across something fitting. Ever had that where something you read, see, or even over hear in a conversation was exactly what you needed? It seems the Universe, God, Life has a way of making that happen.

I've always been a strong believer of balance. It's been my life goal. Thinking, if I achieve balance, I achieve happiness. This goal has been ever so frustrating though because as soon as I find balance in one area (say, nutrition or food in general), it's suddenly lacking in another (suddenly I'm not exercising). I exert so much energy in doing one thing So Perfectly, that something else is completely thrown off, and I find myself quite irritable because I simply haven't found balance in (enough) time with friends or family. Then I eat a whole chocolate cake and my eating is subsequently thrown out of wack. (I am craving chocolate today for some reason!)

So I'm on this treadmill of perfection. I tread daily. I believe It exists. If I try hard enough. Sweat through it. Run enough miles, so to speak, I'll find the mecca of Balance.

I try, I fail. Rinse and Repeat. (Rinse as in start all over!)

So discouraging! Have you been there? Felt that irritation with yourself? Why can't I get it right? The online article about how I should be eating all organic food is stuck in my mind. Then there's the commercial about Depression. Depression Hurts. Better balance my mental health too. And some TV talk show expert says to avoid the harmful chemicals in counter top cleaners. Note to self: stop at the health store. And my therapist's recommendations about how to keep up healthy relationships- how to fight fair. Blown that a few times. As a self help junkie I find myself bombarded with it constantly.

Then I fail again. Or so it feels.

So when I read my daily devotional, it reached out and smacked me, in a friendly way, on the forehead.

I couldn't find the exact quote from my meditation book, so I'll sum it up. Constant balance is not the natural way of things. The world is in constant flux however. The pendulum swings one way, but then later finds middle ground again. There will be periods of imbalance because that's the way this life and our world works. So instead of fighting it, I'm working on accepting those times when I just feel "ick" and out of sorts. When I have days where nothing "goes right" or when I don't get enough sleep. Times when a relationship is rocky. It's going to happen. It's just a matter of acceptance.